Mother, Father, Sister, Brother, Friend, Teacher, Child, Parent, Seeker, Preacher, Singer, Poet, Creator, Destroyer, Dreamer…
One of the most interesting quandaries of human life, for me, is the idea of identity. Who the hell do you think you are? And why do we expect identity to be constant, stable?
“Because people need to be able to trust you!”
Well sure. I will continue to be a mother until I die. I will continue to be a wife. When I say I will continue to be a child, though, an interesting twinge appears.
A part of me will always be my parents’ child. I strive daily to maintain a childlike joy in life and in creativity, but my body ages. My mind ages. My ideas change. So am I a child or not? Ask my mom. Ha!
People get nervous when someone changes fast. It hits us right in the amygdala. Our brains are hard-wired to resist change. I remember the look on my then boyfriend’s face when I cut my thigh-length hair off to a chin length bob while he was out one night… I think he thought it was me cutting off our relationship… Fortunately, he’s become accustomed to my behavior…
You can count on a person’s core most of the time, but expecting them to hold the lines of expected identity is a horse of a different color. Even giving them the freedom for change, whether they take it or not, makes humans happier, healthier creatures. Change is inevitable, after all.
Do you trust me?
Onward and upward
As always, with love
Things We Held.